You ever been asked point-blank what does success mean to you?

I have.

A couple of times.

The most notable was when I was 16 years old competing for Miss Dance of Alabama, Georgia, and Tennessee. For the interview portion of this competition I had to sit down with about five judges and they all had questions for me.

One of them was “How do you define success?”

Another one was “How do you think you’ll feel if you win?”

Some really pressing questions … well, for a 16-year-old girl who was truthfully just there to dance, (and had to be persuaded to do a solo in the first place, and who had only done a handful of interview prep sessions) both questions felt like the bar exam.

I answered the first question by saying “I think success is when you’re proud of where you are and what you’ve done…”

Something along those lines - I recall it wasn’t marked by money or material things but by purpose and personal accomplishment. In hindsight, I’m pretty pleased with that answer.

The second question: How do you think you’ll feel if you win?….

I simply blank stared at this judge and said “Hmm, I haven’t even thought about that”.

Lol y’alllllllllll - I wish I was kidding.

I was dead serious. I’m sure they could tell I was serious by the look on my face because everyone gave an uncomfortable laugh when I just stuck to my answer - didn’t even try to elaborate…

The irony is, I won Miss Dance.

I was absolutely shocked and the way I felt was even more interesting.

I remember diminishing the win and thinking “oh but so-and-so wasn’t in the competition this year and oh it wasn’t out of that many people and oh one of the judges knew someone you knew and that was probably a favor.”

We all have our battles.

Errrr lessons.

One of mine has been embracing my worth and stepping fully into my blessings and gifts.

I bring this up because at 46 you think I’d have this on lock.

Most of the time I’m good.

Yet the last two weeks I’ve been faced yet again with defining success, and what it means to win….to win at life?

The gritty details are irrelevant, but every time I’ve broken a barrier or shattered a glass ceiling that I’ve set for myself the prerequisite is some bone chilling reflection.

I’m not one of those people that walks around with my values on my sleeve, but they’re imprinted within me. I LIVE THEM.

They’re hopefully imprinted on my son and at times they have to be reevaluated.

Your environment is sneaky like that.

If you choose to surround yourself with go-getters, extremely powerful, generous, positive, creative visionaries than you’re gonna need to expand.

If you choose to surround yourself with complacent, nagging, negative, selfish people then you’re gonna need to make peace with stagnation.

Your best bet is to embrace reflection. Embrace feedback and know that it speaks loudly about the person offering the feedback. (Including what you’re reading from me right now.)

Abraham Hicks says “The universe hears what you mean, not what you say”.

When I reflect on that Miss Dance interview question, what I meant was “I’ll define success by how this performance goes. If I was able to do what I’ve set out to do.” I hadn’t thought about what it feels like to win because I was present for the moment… Just there to perform, share this craft and embody my expression.

The universe heard SHE’S HERE, NOW.

Maybe I won because it was a favor.

Maybe I won because the number of contestants was smaller.

Or maybe I won because I deserved it.

It was my time to win.

The frequency of being present is so magnificent that when you stand in your power, relaxed and open, the world responds.

When you’re asked a tough question, MEAN what you say.

OKAYILOVEYOUBYEEE,

xx

Nic.

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pps. Fammmm. There is still time to grab YOLKED and share the story of how following your intuition, being bold and staying curious can bring about an EGGcellent life experience for the PERFECT EASTER BASKET STUFFER, graduation gift, or just well intentioned surprise. Please grab a copy (hardcopy is my fav) on Amazon or Barnes and Noble today.

ppps. THE LATEST EPISODE OF SHOCK AND YALL IS OUT NOW and I’m speaking with NICOLE RITTER, is a Board Certified Holistic Health Practitioner, FDN-P, Holistic Nutritionist and founder of Ritter Functional Health. She began her deeply personal health and wellness journey six years ago to find answers to her own health problems. She has been able to completely reverse her debilitating migraines, chronic sinus infections, depression, anxiety and hormone imbalances. She became a FDN-P and Holistic Nutritionist so she could help her clients find the root cause(s) of their health issues, address those root causes and THRIVE in all areas of life and in health. Nicole is magnetic, whip smart, fun and super approachable obviously because all Nicoles are. We discuss western medicine, gluten, stress, auto-immune issues and so much more.

Here are a few clips…enjoy, listen and share with your friends…

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